Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Goodbyes Are Hard

My Abbie's gone to London.
I started going through all the art work of my children, trying to make space in my home after the holiday haul and I found this self-portrait of Abigail, when she was in kindergarten.

She still has a beautiful and infectious smile. She still has a little left of her original very strawberry blond hair. Her eyes have morphed into a kaleidoscope of greens, grays, and blues. And she still has a gorgeous and very huge nose (exactly like the portrait) Just kidding, about the nose.

And I'm wondering where all those 20 years went. After her four months in London she will go back to BYU and finish her education, and I realized that these last four months, while she's been home earning money for her trip, have been an unexpected and probably not repeated gift. I already said goodbye when she went off to college and now this goodbye is even more painful, cause she's grown into such an engaging and loving adult.

Goodbyes are hard, whether they are school, or a mission, or long distance moves, or even deaths. Sometimes it's hard to live in the present when our memories of treasured moments of the past entice us to linger and long for a repeat showing.

6 comments:

Sarah Jean said...

Oh, I hurt for you. I'm dreading March 12th when Brandon goes in the Mission Home. Jay and I will truly be empty nesters. It makes me lonely just thinking about it.
Can you visit London - that would be cool. How's Angie?

catherine said...

Still got the stone!

Anonymous said...

Catherine in London in April...I love the idea!

Anonymous said...

My next door neighbor gave me a quote that I like when my mom died. "Grief is the price we pay for love."
I've had so many goodbyes lately that I can hardly stand it. To me the hardest part of growing older seems to be constantly saying goodbye to people I love. I miss your cute Abbie also, and remember that adorable little 5 year old.

Dacia said...

I love your blog - you do so well at expressing yourself. We love getting to keep up - we miss all of you and hope you do well with Abbie gone, you have such a great family!

Michelle said...

hi aunt catherine, i just wanted to write to tell you that i love you SO much, you are a great insperation to me and i thought i should let you know. ok, thats really all i have to say for now, sorry its a little random. :) xoxo